The Ignorance Behind the Notion of “Manly” Gays

by Lucas Witherspoon

Gay men find themselves faced with a variety of colorful defenses and slurs from homophobes and anti-gay advocates to express and mask their ignorance on a near-daily basis. At some point most learn to look past a majority of the bigotry out of acclimation, which in itself is a pretty sad reality. One thing, however, that should never be overlooked or accepted is when gays try to excuse the philistinism of others by claiming that gays somehow bring homophobia on themselves for acting “too gay.”

There are so many facets of that argument that are so incomprehensibly glib that even finding a place to start is difficult.

When it’s said that someone is acting “too gay,” the insinuation is that effeminate gays and men in general are fated to act “manly” at all times, which is in turn highlighting the fact that society’s antiquated gender roles that say all men should be outwardly macho are being readily and unquestionably accepted, thus projecting a virile and simplistic image of what a “real” man should be onto all males. Therefore, those who don’t fit into those inane roles are somehow deemed to be less of a man.

Blaming a gay person for the nescience of others because they don’t necessarily fit a stereotypical societal gender role is along the same lines as blaming a woman for getting raped because she was deemed to have been dressed too provocatively. The criticism shouldn’t be directed at the person being attacked, it should be cast upon how we as a society think. In the same way that a man’s feminine traits or a woman’s masculine traits shouldn’t warrant censure, particularly not from within the gay community itself, the act of rape shouldn’t be considered the fault of the victim either.

Yes, there are obviously gay men who are more generically masculine than others, but it doesn’t somehow reduce those who are more flamboyant to a lower mark in some sort of unspoken manhood caste system. If you have a penis, you are biologically a man: it’s a pretty cut-and-dry philosophy. The espousal of sciolistic notions not only damages the plight of the gay community as a whole, but these idiotic interpretations of gender being perpetuated also wholly impair overall societal intellect. When someone is thrusting society’s doltish anti-gay sentiments upon the shoulders of gay people who are just being themselves, it realistically not only highlights that individual’s personal obtuseness, but subsequently aligns them with a much larger group of dimwits.

How about instead of being divisive, we just let people be? A glitter-doused twink dancing in a Pride parade isn’t any less of a man than a burly daddy kicking back with a few beers to watch Sunday Night Football. Either way, non-conformity is a much better option than being a simpleton.